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What To Wear To A Funeral (And What To Avoid)

 

Funerals are tough ceremonies to get through.

Not only do you have to say goodbye to someone special, but you have to share in the pain with those around you.

As you grow older, the more funerals you end up having to attend.

If you’ve never attended one before, then you may be unsure what the proper dress code for a funeral even is.

To ensure you wear the right thing to a funeral, follow these examples.

 

What To Wear To A Funeral (And What To Avoid)

 

1. Dark Colors

burial, people and mourning concept - unhappy woman with red roses and coffin at funeral in church

 

One of the most common traits of a funeral that you should adhere to is to wear dark colors.

Dark colors are typically associated with mourning or grieving.

While this isn’t the case for all cultures, it is a common feature.

The most popular color to wear to a funeral is black.

Black is often associated with death or the mourning of death.

However, if you don’t own anything black, you don’t have to go out and buy yourself a new outfit just for the funeral.

Other dark colors are also acceptable.

For example, a dark blue, like navy, works just as well.

You can also wear dark red, dark green, and even dark brown to a funeral.

As long as the shade isn’t bright or neon, you can probably get away with wearing it to a funeral and appear respectable.

Wearing the right color is the first part of choosing the correct outfit to wear at a funeral.

 

2. Conservative

Young woman in black clothes visiting cemetery with many white crosses

 

The second part of the equation is the style of the outfit.

When attending a funeral, you don’t want to wear anything too risqué.

You’ll want to wear conservative clothing.

Conservating clothing essentially means clothing that covers a lot of your skin.

If you want to wear a dress, for example, then it needs to be a long dress that covers your legs.

It’s also preferable to cover your arms as well or to wear something that covers your arms.

For men, it usually means wearing pants and not shorts.

Wearing clothing that isn’t conservative generally seems disrespectful.

It makes you look as though you’re there to party rather than to mourn the passing of someone.

The only exception is if the family specifically intends to throw a party rather than a typical funeral.

Then you might be able to show a bit of skin.

Otherwise, you’ll want to choose clothes that cover your skin.

 

3. Flats Or Dress Shoes

Black classic shoes isolated on a white background

 

When it comes to footwear, what you choose also matters.

The family and guests will be taking your entire outfit into account, and that includes what you choose to wear on your feet.

To be the most respectable, you’ll want to wear either flats or dress shoes.

Flats are acceptable as long as they’re in good condition.

For example, you don’t want to wear the flats that you regularly wear.

If they’re dirty or scuffed up, then you won’t present a very respectable image.

It looks as though you simply donned whatever shoes were on hand and left for the funeral.

This might mean that you need to go buy some new flats, or you can take the time to clean your current ones.

It’s also important that you buy flats that are in the right color.

You’ll still want to stay away from neon or bright colors.

Instead, you’ll want to choose flats that are either neutral in color or, at the very least, dark.

If you don’t own flats, you can also get away with wearing low-heeled shoes.

This isn’t the time to break out the stilettos or high-heeled shoes.

A low heel looks fancy but you won’t draw too much attention to yourself.

As with the flats, you’ll want to ensure that they’re a dark color and not bright.

As for men, the best thing you can wear is dress shoes.

Loafers, for example, are an excellent example of an appropriate style of shoe.

They should also be clean.

These aren’t dress shoes that you wear often to work, for example.

They should be clean of dirt and any scuff marks.

It’s also important that you have the right color.

While it’s rare to find dress shoes that are brightly colored, they do exist.

As such, ensure you’re wearing the standard brown or black dress shoes.

A final detail to consider is to ensure that your laces are properly tied.

Having untied laces or laces that look sloppy can be disrespectful.

As long as you’re choosing flats, short heels, or dress shoes, your footwear should be perfect for a funeral.

 

4. Dress Or Suit

Businessman tie and suit, close up

 

When it comes to the actual outfit you should wear at a funeral, you’ll want to choose either a dress or a suit.

For ladies, dresses should be long.

You don’t want to wear something like a prom dress, however.

Evening dresses aren’t the exact look you’re going for.

Instead, you’ll want something like a conservative business dress.

It isn’t a party dress since you’re not attending a party.

The cut of the dress should also be simple.

This isn’t the time to try out a new dress with a unique or impressive cut.

You’re not looking to turn heads or gain attention at a funeral.

Instead, you’re just looking to dress nicely to show your respect to the family and to the one who has passed away.

The neckline of the dress is also important.

In keeping with a conservative approach, you’ll want to keep the neckline fairly shallow.

You don’t want to wear anything with a plunging neckline.

You’ll want to ensure that the dress covers your shoulders, at the very least.

Exposing your arms may be acceptable if it’s a hot day.

Otherwise, you might want to add a jacket or shawl to your dress.

Finally, you’ll want to keep the print on the dress simple.

While a small print or design is acceptable, you don’t want anything too wild or eye-catching.

The best dress to wear is something that’s a solid dark color.

Men should wear a suit to a funeral.

While you don’t need to wear a three-piece suit, you should have some semblance of it.

For example, you should wear a dress shirt and tie at the very least.

You should also wear dress pants that don’t have any holes in them.

Along with your shirt and tie, you might choose to wear a vest if you were particularly close to the person who passed.

Otherwise, you should wear a shirt and tie at the bare minimum.

The shirt itself should also lack print.

It should be a solid, dark color.

By wearing a conservative dress or dress shirt, your outfit is ready for a funeral.

 

5. Hat Or Umbrella

Elegant sad elderly man standing on the rain with umbrella and grieves at the grave of a loved person

 

A lot of people will also choose to wear a hat or bring an umbrella to a funeral.

A hat can be risky, however.

It’s often seen as disrespectful if you wear a hat to a funeral.

However, the key rests in knowing when to wear it and when to take it off.

The type of hat also matters.

For example, this isn’t the time to wear a baseball cap.

Instead, sun hats, fedoras, or similar styles of hats are more appropriate.

The hat shouldn’t be too bright or cheerful either.

This isn’t the time to wear a hat covered in flowers or with bright ribbons, for example.

It’s often better to go without a hat.

However, if you do choose to bring a hat, then you should know when to take it off.

You can wear your hat outside of the funeral home, but once you’re inside the building, you’ll need to take off your hat.

You can also choose to wear it until you greet the family or walk into the space where the visitation is happening.

Removing your hat when you greet the family or enter the visitation space is respectful.

You’ll then need to keep your hat off throughout the ceremony.

You can put it back on once you leave the funeral home.

You can also wear it to the cemetery.

However, as before, you’ll need to remove your hat when the ceremony at the cemetery begins.

If you don’t want to wear a hat, you can also choose to bring an umbrella.

This is ideal if the funeral is taking place on a rainy day.

It’s acceptable to have your umbrella open at the cemetery if it’s raining.

You can wear a hat or bring an umbrella to a funeral as long as it’s a conservative hat.

 

6. Accessories

watch in a man

 

Another thing you can wear to a funeral is accessories.

However, you’ll want to keep your accessories to a limit.

Wearing a watch, for example, is acceptable.

You can also wear a necklace, bracelet, or your usual rings.

The key is to ensure that the jewelry isn’t too extravagant.

The goal is to keep yourself conservative.

As such, this isn’t the time to break out your best jewelry with the biggest diamond on it.

Nor is it the time to wear your biggest earrings.

Keep your jewelry muted and conservative to appear the most respectful.

For men, you can bring sunglasses, but you should be able to tuck them away in your pocket when you enter the funeral home.

You don’t want to hang them off of a pocket.

You should also refrain from wearing them during the ceremony at the cemetery.

Men can also wear cuff links if they’re wearing a suit jacket, but the cuff links should also be conservative.

 

7. Cultural Items

Hindu Balinese people in Jakarta praying in the North Jakarta for a purification ceremony

 

The religion of the family can also determine what you wear to a funeral.

For example, some religions might require certain hats or cultural clothes.

Others stick to certain colors.

For example, a Hindu funeral usually has everyone dressed in white rather than black.

Others might dress in bright colors that have symbolic meaning in the Hindu religion.

Such colors might be saffron, green, or even blue.

In Asia, mourners will never wear red since red is the color of happiness in that country.

As such, it’s important to know the culture of the family before attending a funeral.

It might indicate that you need to wear something beyond a standard conservative dress or suit.

 

What To Avoid Wearing At A Funeral

 

1. Bright Colors

couple with wedding ring holding each other hands

 

One of the first things you should avoid wearing to a funeral is bright colors.

Unless the culture of the family specifically requests it, in most cases, you should only wear dark colors.

Bright colors are usually associated with feelings of joy or happiness.

Wearing something bright to a funeral can give the wrong impression.

You may make yourself seem as though you’re happy the person died.

It’s also disrespectful to the family.

Even if you have good intentions and want to help ease their pain, the best thing you can do is wear dark colors to a funeral.

 

2. Wild Prints

Women's brown blouses with classic animal print pant, coat, scarf, jacket, sweater, handbag on hangers

 

You’ll also want to stay away from wild prints.

This isn’t the time to break out a suit that has a graphic on it, for example.

Nor do you want to show up in a simple t-shirt with a graphic on it.

This also goes for dresses.

Women shouldn’t wear dresses that have some sort of distracting print on them.

If the print is too in-your-face, then it can also come off as though you’re celebrating the fact that the person is dead.

Wild prints are usually associated with social occasions.

A funeral isn’t really a social occasion.

While it is a gathering of people, it’s more about paying respect to the person who has passed and less about celebrating.

As such, you’ll want to stay away from wearing prints that are a bit too wild or decorative.

 

3. Athletic Wear

Handsome man wearing blank white hoodie and pants sitting on light gray background

 

Another thing to avoid is athletic wear.

This isn’t the time to wear comfortable clothes like leggings, sweatpants, or shirts without sleeves.

You’ll also want to avoid wearing a hoodie to a funeral.

If you’re cold, then you’ll need to bring a jacket.

Athletic wear is far too casual for an event like a funeral.

If you dress up in athletic wear, you make yourself appear as though you don’t care about the person who passed.

This is disrespectful to the family in mourning and hurtful.

You can always wear it on the way to the funeral house, but you’ll need to change in the car.

In most cases, it’s best to just leave the athletic wear at home.

 

4. Tank Tops

man in black tank top posing on gray background

 

Tank tops are another clothing type to avoid wearing to a funeral.

You may feel some temptation to put on a tank top if the funeral takes place on a hot day.

However, wearing a tank top is too casual.

It’s disrespectful.

You can get away with wearing a short-sleeved dress as long as the dress’s design is conservative.

 

5. Flip-Flops Or Sneakers

Legs of young woman in flip-flops on color background

 

When it comes to footwear, the two main styles you should avoid are flip-flops and sneakers.

Flip-flops or sandals are also too casual for a funeral.

This isn’t a time to show off your feet.

Sneakers are also disrespectful, especially if they’re dirty or worn.

Some sneakers might be acceptable if they’re clean and look more like dress shoes.

In most cases, however, you should avoid wearing either flip-flops or sneakers.

 

6. Heavy Perfume Or Cologne

 man in formal suit and with bottle of perfume

 

A final thing you shouldn’t wear to a funeral is heavy perfume or cologne.

It may be tempting to douse yourself in a heavy scent because it’s often deemed fancy, but you’re going to be in a room with a lot of people.

All that perfume and cologne is sure to give someone a headache.

It can also make you seem as though you’re trying to stick out and have people take notice of you.

To ensure the focus is on the family and the one who passed, you’ll want to keep your perfume and cologne to a limit.

 

Conclusion

Funerals can be difficult to dress for.

By following the examples above, you’ll know what you should wear and what you should avoid.

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